Marriage Proposal from a Monk

I live in Thailand. The following experience happened to me in Chiang Mai.

Last spring I received a marriage proposal. It happened all quite innocently.

The Thais were indulging in their weeklong water fight (Songkran) and by the end of the week--I had had enough. I was tired of getting wet so I sought refuge at a temple. I had just found a delightful place (a bench between two trees) to read when a Buddhist monk approached me. He stood over my bench adjusting his robe and talking to me in Thai.

After I let him know that I didn’t understand him, he switched to English. He was casual, but I was nervous as I reviewed the culturally-appropriate-ways-to-relate-to-a-monk. I thought of the rules: 1) Never touch a monk. Check, easy enough. 2) Don't point your feet at them. He sat cross-legged across from me on the park bench; I worried that sitting cross-legged across from him might somehow qualify as pointing-my-feet.

For a while we had a nice, but relatively boring conversation. We discussed the number of siblings we had. My job. His job. Tourism. Thailand. But then the conversation took a slight turn (almost unnoticeable at first but it grew stranger by the moment). First he asked me if I could teach him. I said it was possible if he was interested in attending my school. The conversation meandered along and then again he asked if he could be my student. Yes, yes, I reassured him that that was completely possible. But then he changed his tone. Could he follow me? Well, yes of course I told him. He was more than welcome to visit my school. Then he asked again. Could he follow me? Finally, I asked, “What do you mean when you say you want to follow me?”

He said, “get married.” He was very was very optimistic about our compatibility. He listed why I was a perfect candidate for marriage. He said, "you speak a little Thai” (I’m not sure how he reached that conclusion); "my parents like foreigners"; and "we're not too different in age" (he's 21--a 7 year gap). And the final kicker he said, "you could become a Buddhist."* Then he said (quite dramatically I might add), "when I'm done with these yellow robes then I'll come find you."

With such small barriers to marriage, why not?

*When I noted that I wasn’t ready to convert to Buddhism anytime soon. He offered to compromise. He could become a Christian.